Dear Dr. Bill,

My husband is seeing a psychologist because of his addiction to alcohol and marijuana. My children and I have been delighted as he seems to be doing very well. He seems to be more like his old self; the guy I loved and chose to marry.

However, he came home the other night following a treatment session during which he claims his therapist told him that he could have a drink "now and then" because he has it "under control" now! I could hardly believe my ears!

I always thought that once a person has lost control of his drinking (or using) and has successfully stopped, he couldn't use the stuff again or he would likely lose control again. I'm scared and mad. It took so long for him to sober up and now I see it all going down the tubes again. Can you help me sort this out? Any advice?

Scared - Bergenfield

Dear Scared,

I gather from the tone of you letter that your husband's drinking problem and use of marijuana has created more than a few years of misery for you and your family, let alone the direct effects that the chemicals have had on your husband's physical, mental and spiritual self. Well you might be scared when you learn that your husband's "therapist" has given him permission to use and drink again.

There are some published studies which have attempted to prove that alcoholism is not a medical illness; that it is merely a behavioral disorder..... ergo, modify the behavior and the alcoholic can "be like other people" and resume drinking. Let me emphasize, right here and now, the vast amount of professional, peer-reviewed, scientific literature clearly refutes this viewpoint.

For any "therapist" who is apparently deluded into believing that it is ethical (let alone, moral) to even suggest to an alcoholic/addict that it is alright to use again, I urge your attendance at some open AA or Alanon meetings (as, surely, your husband's psychologist has never done) and listen to the disaster stories of alcoholics who, after a period of sobriety, "go out" again. If your husband has been going to AA meetings, as he should have been, as well as seeing his so-called "therapist," he must be either using ear plugs during the meetings or, consistent with a saying by those of us working in the addiction treatment field, until totally sober, "whenever an alcoholic's lips are moving he or she is lying." I suggest that either your husband is giving you a classic "con job" so that he can drink and use again or his "therapist" is treading on mighty dangerous ground... giving advice which may well be his death sentence.

I would strongly suggest that you and your husband demand to see his psychologist's credentials... this is simply no the kind of advice that a properly trained professional would give. Such credentials may be in the form of Certified Alcoholism Counselor (CAC) or Certified Alcoholism and Drug Counselor (CADC). Further, simply having a PhD or Masters Degree in Social Work (MSW) or in an allied health field is not sufficient unless there are significant educational credits in addiction counseling.

I would also caution acceptance of an M.D. Degree without the provision of proof of special expertise (such as certification by the American Society of Addiction Medicine) or extensive experience in the treatment of addictive illnesses. Properly trained specialists perform necessary diagnostic procedures, including at least an extensive psycho-social interview, before advising an patient to enter treatment... further, actual treatment does not commence without provision of a treatment plan which should be shared with the new patient.

If your husband's "therapist" originally diagnosed him as an alcoholic/addict and is now telling him that he can drink again... I must repeat... he may well be pronouncing his death sentence. Alcoholism (addiction) is a chronic, progressive disease which, if left untreated (or "mistreated"), will inevitably end in insanity or death. If your husband's so-called "therapist" works for a treatment center, I strongly urge that you report him or her to the Clinical Director. A reputable addiction treatment facility would probably fire him.

At the very least, get a new therapist and make sure that the new person has the proper credentials. No properly trained, ethical individual would risk the life of the patient by offering such advice... Good Luck!